So it’s been a while since I made my last post. For starters, I turned 27. I’m officially in my late twenties!!! Woooo hoooo! Shout out to all of my strong-headed Aries out there! We’re such awesome people (and have probably annoyed the entire instagram and twitter nation with our hashtags). Forgive us, we’re a proud bunch… #ariesseason!!!
Life’s been a blur, especially over the past week. I’ll be honest, 27 is an age that woke me up a bit. I’ll fill you in on all my birthday details in my next blog post, but for now, here’s my last post about facts and myths about unemployment. No bullsh*t, just straight up unfiltered and fabulous bombs getting dropped:
- FACT – There will be a lull in your job application progress. That’s right, if you’re unemployed you are a straight up LIAR if you say that you apply to 10 jobs a day 7 days a week. I found that as desperate as I am to find my next job, it’s almost twice as unmotivating to keep getting told “no, you’re not employable here”. I’ve been given every excuse about why I’m not the right fit for a job. I’ve been told I am under qualified, over qualified, inexperienced, too expensive (HA, story of my life but I’m not working for $42K per year)… In fact, the only “job offer” that I received was to be a “professional snitch” during the job application process at L’Oreal. Uhmmmm, no thank you! If I get a job offer from L’Oreal (omg… that would be so amazing), it won’t be after I report back to some sketchy “research company”. In short, it’s discouraging. I’ve found myself not wanting to apply after a solid 5 weeks of rejection. My solution – I checked out for 6 days in a row and maximized my Netflix subscription to the fullest. FYI, walking dead is amaazzziiiiinnngggg. I’m not ashamed to admit that I slacked off, this is my journey and I’m still owning it. Maybe it will bite me in the ass in the long run, but for now, I give the universe and the rest of corporate America a seriously fabulous *shoulder shrug*. I still think I’m awesome
- MYTH – You will lose weight! When I was working at my last job, I rarely took lunch breaks. I was too busy answering phones and running up and down the upper west side of Manhattan with marketing materials poking out of my Louis Vuitton bag. In my “down time” I was emailing, and texting, and talking to my network of marketing professionals to make sure the dental practice was still afloat. I ate at my desk, and the portions were small and rushed. And then I quit. My daily activities did not include treking up Central Park West with gifts for new clients, it include applying to jobs, blogging, social media-ing and watching TV from my couch. Sometimes when I’m tired of staring at my apartment’s walls, I switch it up and do my daily activities from my boyfriend’s couch (yeup, the boo is back!). My theory was since I quit my job, I’ll have no money. I’ll starve and look super slim, which would be super awesome during the summer. Unfortunately, I learned that you don’t have to spend more than $30 – $50 a week on food if you don’t want to, so I wasn’t exactly starving. Plus, I’m a snacker! If you mix a coupon savvy shopper who has very little distractions in her everyday life, you get me. I’m a shameless snackaholic who is a chip away from an epic pooch. Healthy snacks are great… I must say ,I generally feel better now that I’m drinking more water and barely eating fast food… BUT, too much of a good thing can be a bad thing. If I eat one more baked chip or low-calorie brownie, I just might start to gain some weight… which would be horrible because I plan on dipping it, shaking it and swooping it over the summer. My Ri-yonce stomp is that hot fiyah and Zumba is giving me some major Saturday night moves (HAHAHA). So anyway, since I don’t move around as much and live that couch potato life, all of my healthy food just sits in my stomach. Maybe I’ll focus on portion control this month.. but maybe not lol.
- FACT – You will absolutely not sacrifice everything you need to sacrifice. Remember when I told you about all my crazy monthly expenses in my post “You don’t know how to be poor”??? Welp, guess what mofos?! That list is still getting worked out, so you are just going to have to help me pray on that.
- Just because I have 8 visits left of my wax pass at the European Wax Center, a gift card to the spa and another 2 visits left on my eyebrow threading pass at Shobha doesn’t mean that I get to leave out the tip for my Aestheticians. In my mind, I make my spending choices based on the number of coupons, gift cards and savings passes in my pocketbook. I’ve saved sooooo much money, but if I were being super honest, I do tend to over tip when I’m at any of my preferred beauty sanctuaries. I think I “regular” tip now… lol. I will always be a hot mess, and try my best to spend conservatively now that I’m jobless… but I will never sew in my own weave and the last time I checked, unibrows, women’s facial hair and 70’s inspired vaginal pubes are not on trend. Just saying.